We're Having a Baby! And It's a Girl!

Photo by: Caitlin Binda

Pinterest sometimes fills my head with too many ideas and aspirations.  I’m not sure Paul approves of my “Fantasy Land.”  But once in a while, a great pin comes along and you just have to go with it.  Like the balloon gender reveal that caught my eye a couple of years ago.  We had so much fun doing this for Baby #2!  I’ll have to admit, when the pink balloons flew out of the box, both Paul & I were a little surprised…ok maybe a lot surprised.  Isn’t it just natural to expect a boy when you already have a girl?  Anyway, we are thrilled that Ava will have a little sister soon!  Hopefully she won’t mind that the new baby’s due date is the same day as her birthday…  Yep, April 11^th it is :)

 So once again, our lives are about to change drastically.  For the better, of course.  And I couldn’t be more excited!  Thank you so much to our family and friends who have shared in this excitement with us already.  On the days when I wonder how we can live our rodeo of a life with another baby in the house, I just think about families like the Parsons, and the Webers, and the Campbells—all awesome families who are great models for us.  And I’m reminded of my cousin Cristy’s advice.  It’s not that you gain some kind of superpowers to do everything perfectly even when you have a zillion responsibilities as a working Mom.  “You just have to lower your standards.”  Wise words from a mother of two.  So what if the toys don’t get picked up EVERY night?  (I wish my house looked like Emily’s, but it just doesn’t and probably never will)  And does it really matter if my neighbors hate my lawn?  When you don’t have time to slave over the stove and bring an excellent dish to a family meal, just bring the sodas and the dinner rolls.

 Congratulatory flowers from my sweet friend & college roommate, Sarah.

For Ava’s gender reveal, we ordered a cake from Publix.  We invited all of our in-town family members to our house for a dinner gathering.  When it came time to cut the cake and reveal whether it was pink or blue on the inside, our out-of-town family members were “with us” on speaker phone.  It was an exciting moment— until the cake turned out to be white.  Anti-climactic to say the least.  Publix has been on my bad list since then!  This time around, I decided to redo the cupcake reveal with my basketball team at CSU, and delivered them to some family as well.  I made the cupcakes myself just to ensure that each one was carefully filled with pink icing.  Well, all but one, right Mand?  Ha.  That’s what I get for icing cupcakes at 11:30pm.

 Gender reveal cupcakes

We are grateful for God’s abundant blessings.  Ava is just about 20-months old and she is the light of our lives.  A healthy pregnancy tops the list of things not to take for granted.  We are very much enjoying this holiday season so far.  And as I was writing out our Dec/Jan family calendar the other day, I got to write “Paul starts school” for the last time!!  He will complete his final semester of dental school in the Spring and graduate in May!  For quite some time, I had been day dreaming about a celebratory graduation vacation for the two of us.  You know me and planning—I just can’t help myself.  So I had some plans in the works and had hoped it would all be a great surprise for Paul in the end.  But with Baby #2 on the way, Curacao will have to wait!  Of all the reasons to put travel plans on hold and stay home, I cannot think of a better one.     

 Curacao

Imagine Life Without Post-It Notes

I have always been a list maker.  Work to-do, personal to-do, potential baby names, home decorating hopes, gift ideas, professional goals…all ongoing lists that can be found printed neatly on legal pads, scribbled on sticky notes, and written crudely on my hand.  I think I make my boss nervous when he asks me to do something important and I make note of it on my palm, but that’s actually where the highest priority stuff goes, so I can’t possibly forget it.  Since Ava was born, my list making habit has become a necessity.  As it turns out, what they say about mommy-mush brain is true, and my memory has been no match for it.

Greensboro, NC

Richmond, VA

New Orleans, LA

San Antonio, TX

Dallas, TX

Syracuse, NY

Boston, MA

Naples, FL

Rochester, NY 

^^The places we will travel to this summer for a basketball recruiting trip, dental residency externship, or family visit.  None of these trips involve Paul and I traveling together, so the next couple of months will be a balancing act for sure. 

Rock n’ Roll singer

Country singer

Teacher

Oncologist

Sports Broadcaster

Architect

Interior Designer

Urban Planner

^^The things I wanted to be as a grown up, before I became a College Basketball Coach. 

“Did you just come from practice?” (because I’m dressed in athletic clothes)

“Oh you’re a coach…what classes do you teach?”

“Are you the head coach?”

“Wait… so you’re telling me coaching is a full-time position?  Why do you need 5 people to coach one team?”

“But it’s not basketball season.  I thought you didn’t work in the summer.”

“I can’t believe your husband gets to go to Hawaii and you’re not even going to take time off to go with him!”  (in February)

“My friend’s little sister plays ball.  She’s a senior this year and I think her team voted her MVP.  She wants to play at your school so I gave her your phone number.”

“Just because you’re head coach is leaving doesn’t mean anything changes for you, right?”

^^The questions/comments I have received most often during the past 4 years.  It’s a little frustrating, but I can see why my job is misunderstood.  People watch big-time college coaches on ESPN and assume that what they see is all there is to it.  But the truth is, game time is just a small fraction of the job.  I could go on and on about all the other things that go into running a college basketball team, but that would take forever.  So let me just clear up some of the most common misunderstandings:

-Basketball shorts, a T-shirt, and tennis shoes are acceptable attire for a regular day at the office.  It does not always mean I just worked out, or that I am going straight to practice.

-Division I coaches are full-time employees.  That is my sole responsibility at the university.  I do not teach any classes. 

-Most Division I coaching staffs look like this:

                Head Coach

                1^st Assistant Coach

                2^nd Assistant Coach

                3^rd Assistant Coach

                Director of Basketball Operations

                (and if you’re at a major DI school, there are several other staff members as well…one or more

                grad assistants, video coordinator, academic advisor, strength & conditioning coach, director

                of player development, student managers, etc.)

-I am NOT the head coach.  While there are some fantastically talented Div. I head coaches in their 20s, they are the exception.  It can be a long, challenging road to the top.  I spent 3 years as a Dir. of Ops at College of Charleston right after I graduated, and I’m now in my second year as 3^rd Assistant at Charleston Southern University.  I do desire to be a head coach one day, and when the time is right I know the Lord will open that door.  My mother-in-law is convinced that I will be an Event Planner in my next job, but that’s besides the point…  

-Coaches work year-round, even if it is not basketball season.  Believe it or not, there’s enough work to do to keep 5 or more people busy all year long.

-During basketball season, days off are few and far between.  Our players have one day off per week (mandated by the NCAA), but that does not necessarily mean the coaches aren’t working.  Coaches CANNOT take vacation during basketball season.  It is not acceptable to miss a game.  Even if our favorite cousin is getting married, we generally don’t do personal travel while in-season.  If you want me to come to your wedding, do not plan it for November-April. 

-When we recruit high school players, we most often “sign” them (make it official that they’ll be on our team) in November of their senior year.  That means we’ve probably been watching them play for 1-3 years prior to that.  If you are contacting us for the first time in March of your senior year, YOU’RE WAY TOO LATE.

Another thing most people don’t know about college coaching: the head coach forms their own staff.  In other words, the assistants are attached to the head coach.  So, when that person leaves, i.e. gets fired, retires, or takes a more desirable position elsewhere, the entire staff is in jeopardy.  It is a very volatile career, and it might move you all around the country.  I’ve had to explain this a lot in the last 2 years, because I’ve been involved in the aforementioned predicaments multiple times.  But each time, God has been MORE than faithful!  Both times I was on the coaching chopping block, He not only protected my job, but he blessed me with more than I asked for or imagined!  During the limbo months, when I was still in the office every day but not sure if my contract would continue, it was brought to my attention that all the hard work I was doing could be for “nothing” if I didn’t get to keep my job.  But that thought had never crossed my mind because the Word says otherwise—whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as if working for the Lord not for men (Col. 3:23); whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might (Eccl. 9:10).  If you find yourself in a situation similar to mine, put your hand to the plow!  Even if you don’t know what the outcome will be.

Enough lists for today…  I’m off to bed where it takes forever to fall asleep because all of tomorrow’s to-do’s run through my head ;)

-Erika

She's one...

Exactly one year ago, I was studying for a Pharmacology exam with my friend Brandon….and as usual, wishing for more time! Well, I got an unexpected answer to my prayer. Erika called and said I should probably come home because she “thought” her water might have broke. We were about a week and a half away from the due date, but I knew her voice was different and we had a serious situation on our hands.

As we checked into the hospital, a few quick tests confirmed that it was indeed “go time” for the Lambert family! And so I slept on and off throughout the night on one of the most uncomfortable pull-out couches you can imagine. As the hours passed…and so did the time for the Pharmacology test…I was struck with the reality that my life was about to change. Jackson and Brandon came by to check in on us, and around lunch-time we started kicking everyone out of the room because Ava was about to make her entrance!

Ava was sooooo beautiful! Her skin was so smooth and her lips made you want to smother her with kisses. Erika reenergized with a timely Starbucks Frappuccino from my sister, Lara, and I proudly paraded around the hospital room holding my daughter. Now honestly, I would have told you straight up that I was hoping for a son so I could rough-house and play sports, but the moment I held this little girl, my heart melted and I was hooked! As we left the hospital Anna, Golden, and Kristin came by to cheer us on…and watch us struggle with installing the car seat. I don’t think I’ve ever driven so carefully over the James Island connector, nor yelled so much at other drivers for their “crazy” driving patterns.

The first night at home she slept beside my side of the bed. Every little noise woke me up and I compulsively checked on her. Over time, I became used to her noises and the nightly rituals of feeding and changing her…every hour or so.

Each month we took a picture of her sitting, then standing, in her green chair to document the changes we could see. But what the pictures can’t exactly show is the change in my life. I went from wanting to stay downtown and play basketball each night, to rushing home after clinics were over so I could pick up Ava and give Erika a few restful moments.

Every event this year this year has been a “first” for either us, or for Ava. There were so many moments when we were amazed at the new thing Ava was able do that week, and we were thankful for the family & friends who made the many transitions of this year seamless.

Now, as Ava develops her own personality and even laughs at my corny jokes, we see what the process of becoming a family means. There’s plenty of sacrifice and compromise, blended with moments of pure joy and total frustration. We’ve balanced the busy schedules of a Division 1 basketball coach and a full time student with a baby who couldn’t care less about our careers, so long as “mamma and daddy” continue to love each other and her more & more each day.

As Ava turns 1, I fully acknowledge that I’m not 100% sure what foods she should and should not be eating. I still don’t enjoy changing diapers and I’d rather roughhouse on the floor than indoctrinate her with the princess mentality just yet. BUT….this little girl has stolen my heart and I’d have it no other way.

Daddy’s little girl shoots me the biggest smile every time I walk into a room. When she points at me and says, “Dadda” and I can’t help but scoop her into my arms and smother with love. The way she nestles into Erika’s arms makes me thankful that my “team” has turned into a little family.

We have truly been blessed with a wonderful little girl, and an amazing support system of family and friends. We’re excited for the new adventures of this next year, and hope that you can share in some of those moments too.

Photos by: Caitlin Binda

Whoa! Come look at this weird poop!

It’s safe to say that Life With the Lamberts is different nowadays. Analyzing poop is just one of the many things I never imagined I’d do, but has now become a routine part of life as a Mama. Other thoughts, sayings, or behaviors that fall under this category include, but are not limited to:

· Doing a double take at a BOB in the Charleston Farmer’s Market. That’s a NICE stroller…

· Constantly asking myself, “How much time do I have?” as in: what can I accomplish between baby’s feedings?

· “It’s your turn.”

· Playing the game Things with unmarried friends at a Bachelorette party. The category is “Things that should not be shared.” First thought that comes to mind: breast pump. (NOTE: I did not submit this response. It would have been a dead giveaway in that crowd!)

· Grocery shopping wearing a Tshirt with spit-up on it. And not caring one bit.

· When bringing baby to a public gathering, always formulating a “meltdown” exit strategy upon arrival.

· Defining success according to sleep. Adequate sleep for Ava, Paul, and Erika=a good day. (Thank you Dr. Weissbluth. And thank you to the Moms who got me on the Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child train.)

The first six weeks of Ava’s life were simply ridiculous. Paul was finishing year 2 of dental school, which was a very challenging time for him. He had to devote tons of time to studying for his National Boards exam (he PASSED!) After my Mom and Grandma left Charleston, I felt like I was flying by the seat of my pants as a parent. Thank God for babycenter.com! Ava has acid reflux and it is just as awful as everyone says it is. She rarely slept early on, and cried most of the time when she was awake. Poor thing! There was not much we could do to help her.

Fast forward to present day, and those early challenges seem like a distant memory. It took us several weeks, but baby and I finally got the hang of the whole breastfeeding thing. Ava sleeps wonderfully at 7pm each night. Paul is a 3^rd year, so he is actually practicing dentistry at school and that is rewarding for him. We were so proud to see Paul get his white coat in July J Plus, he has a lot more time at home. I got a great new job as an Assistant Coach at Charleston Southern University. That was a total blessing! I started believing God for a promotion back in January, without any real reason to believe that a position would open up for me. But the God we serve calls things that are not as though they were (Romans 4:17). So…Go Bucs!!

My heart melts each morning when I get Ava from her nursery. She is always happy, rolling around in her crib and grabbing her toes with the SWEETEST smile on her face. I put her on the changing table and we have our usual morning “conversation.” Then I get to dress her in some precious little girl clothes and we sing the “Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah” song to start the day. I’ll be honest, even though I love to sing I have a hard time coming up with songs to sing to Ava. I can never remember the words to a whole song, so I invent some interesting medleys!

This has been a summer of celebrations: Ava’s birth, Paul’s White Coat ceremony, my little brother’s high school graduation, the Cafarchio wedding, the Brown wedding, and our 3^rd anniversary. That is a whole lot of JOY! We have been able to enjoy this time because we’ve had a LOT of help from family and friends. Thank you so much for the encouragement, gifts, dinners, prayers, and babysitting.

Veteran parents have warned me that just when you think you’ve got the hang of things, babies’ needs change and you have to learn something completely new. That is very true. We’re smooth sailing for now but next up: solid foods! And then the real test: parenting during basketball season. When I’ve had a particularly demanding day, I have often asked myself, “How do you do this with multiple children?!” For now, we’re just taking it step by step, and cherishing the precious moments.

Whoever fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for their children it will be a refuge. Proverbs 14:26

Happy New Year!

“Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.” -Hal Borland

The start of a new calendar year is always a worthy cause for reflection. So last night, after we watched the ball drop, I asked Paul what he thought our 2010 highlights were. It didn’t take us long to come up with a list:

1. A SWEETER MARRIAGE
Admittedly, we had a rough go at it for the first 10 months or so. Paul was a full-time student at the College of Charleston, dealing with the pressure of working his way into dental school. I started working my first real job on staff with my college basketball team. On top of that, I was a full-time grad student and we both worked food & bev jobs on the weekends. Needless to say, life was stressful. And learning how to be married under those circumstances was challenging. But we had great support from our families and friends, and from our Newlywed group at church. We relied on the Lord to make something out of what sometimes seemed like nothing. God has a funny way of refining us, and that was exactly what he did. We didn’t think it was funny at the time. But now we look back at things like the failure of a 1st Christmas, the Hilton Head vacation disaster, and the infamous broken champagne glass—and laugh :) Year Two was much improved, and we’re looking forward to many, many more!

2. ERIKA FINISHING GRADUATE SCHOOL
I remember one of my undergraduate professors telling us that only 1% of the world’s population gets a degree in higher education. So, I have very much appreciated the academic opportunities I’ve had. Nevertheless, walking across that stage to get my Master’s signified freedom! No more homework and studying for tests…need I say more?!

3. PAUL FINISHING HIS 1st YEAR OF DENTAL SCHOOL
Completing the 1st of 4 years was certainly an accomplishment. At this point, Paul has 1 semester left of the “book years,” before he moves on to the “clinic years” this Summer. And he’s going to make a great dentist! C’mon, who wouldn’t trust Paul to put sharp objects in their mouth? No but seriously, I’ve seen such a transformation in my husband during his time in dental school. He’s gone from totally stressing out about everything to taking it all in stride. God never puts more on us than we can handle (1 Corinthians 10:13), and seeking His kingdom FIRST comes with many blessings (Matthew 6:33).

4. OUR EUROPEAN VACATION
What a treat!! We wandered the streets of Venice, climbed up to the Parthenon, drove an ATV around Santorini, walked the fortress wall in Dubrovnik, and watched the sunset from our seaside dinner table in Mykonos. We’re definitely not the hopeless romantic-type, but we couldn’t help but be swept away on this adventure!

5. FINDING OUT WE WERE PREGNANT
2011 is the year of the baby! Our daughter has already captured our hearts, even though she still doesn’t have a name! The debate continues between Ava Leigh (my vote) and Caleigh Ray (Paul’s vote). In baseball, the tie goes to the runner. I have jokingly said that, in this case, the tie goes to the one who has to push it out! But really, we are praying and asking for clarity on what her name should be. God cares about even the details of our lives (Matthew 10:29-31) .

Despite the lack of pink icing, we found out it was a girl! Ask us about the cake story if you don't know it already...;)

Thanksgiving Dinner in Charleston

Our very first Christmas tree!

The basketball team's Christmas Party was at our house. Here they are with their Secret Santa gifts!

Christmas morning in NY

We have had a wonderful end to 2010. We celebrated Thanksgiving with the Lambert family in Charleston, and went to my home in Upstate NY for Christmas. Basketball season is well underway, and our young CofC team is looking better every day. The baby’s nursery has a crib and a changing table (thank you to our family for the wonderful gifts!), and some paint samples on the wall. Who knew that painting the room purple would be such a task?! Cosmic Berry? Grape Juice? Lavender Whisper? We shall see…

January 2011 promises to be an interesting start to the new year! For me—Weeks #25-#28 of pregnancy and poundage to go with it; Childbirth Education & Breastfeeding classes; and lots of Southern Conference basketball action. For Paul—the start of a new dental school semester (this is when they get to start using the novocaine needle!); Boot Camp for Dads; and plenty of home improvement projects! And for you—we hope 2011 is a terrific year!

-Erika